ucl kendo

Jakob Barber and Ted Theodore Rutter joined UCL very recently, having graduated from Cambridge and floating towards the bright lights of the big city like moths to a flame. Thats it, my pretties, like moths to a flame.... They are apparently inseperable (hence the one top trump for the both of them) and have even tried on each others pants. They share a psychic mind link with each other, and know what the other one will have for breakfast, before he eats it. Spooky. Contray to common belief their names are infact interchangeable and you could, for example refer to one of them as "Jakob Rutter" or even "Rutter Barber" and get the same effect.

Recently Rutter Theo, absorbed Jake into his being and thus Jake no longer exists.

Stats

• SIZE: 4/8
• POWER: 5/6
• STAMINA: 8
• TECHNIQUE: 6
• SPEED: 6/7
• YEARS TRAINED: 3
• UCL FACTOR: -5.93

Current Status

HonouraryMember DishonourableDischarge

Weaknesses

• They have a simbiotic relationship which means that one or the other will die if they are seperated by a distance of more than 20 metres
• Alan's magnificent schlong (in his own words)

Special Abilities

• They can combine their powers to form the ultimate fighting mega zord!
• They know the fit and snugness of each others pants.
• Jakob likes thongs
• Thedore likes anything in leopard skin.

Quotes

• We are the borg.
• Yes, I have been called Barbara before
• Is Gibbo simply an arsehole, or is his brain not connected to his mouth?
• If you were in prison and were told to, do you think you could take a shinai up the arse?
• What about this one? (produces a one of those six staved beast shinais)
• I cut the top off my finger chopping some vegetables
• Kendo is his religion
• WHY DON'T YOU JUST HURRY UP AND FUCK HER UP THE ARSE
• Alan, I love you.
• BAD ALAN!