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Unteroffizier Anthony "Und ze weak und frail must die" Wadlow

Ant joined UCL Kendo Club during its first year in action. He took the title of "Sozial offizier" for 2005 where he carried out a mediocre job until he became "Der Fuhrer" after asassinating various political opponents for the year of 2005-2006 and has done bloody well. He now fights in Jodan becuase of a horrific amount of injuries. He is taking the job of "die Schatzmeister" off Joe for 2006-2007. Ant is also the club loser when it comes to interaction with beautiful ladies, and his non-conquests include various bar tenders and waitresses from around the capital. He is also well know for his extreme right-wing politcal opinions and can often be heard talking about how individual liberties must be suppressed to improve the strength of the state. He also enjoys reminicising about the occasion where he shot down Albert Ball

For the purpose of worried future employers or people who are about to fail me a police background check, none of the information on this page is true and any that is has been stretched for the purpose of humour. Please take no part of this seriously.

Stats

  • SIZE: 6
  • POWER: 9
  • STAMINA: 7
  • TECHNIQUE: 6
  • SPEED: 5
  • YEARS TRAINED: 3
  • UCL FACTOR: 0 (or 9.9994 only when he turns up to competitions)

CurrentStatus

PrisonerOfWar

Arch-Enemies

  • Douglas Bader
  • Eisenhower
  • That floppy haired, Bandana (tenugui) wearing, jive talking **NT!

Favourite Books

  • Mein Kampf
  • How to crush a nation for dummies
  • Wind in the Willows

Favourite Animals

  • The infamous Rat-Slugs

Favourite Food

  • Beans!
  • Jelly

Tall Tales

  • Anthony's Absinthe Nightmare
  • Why Anthony Wadlow should die of Herpes and Rot In Hell
  • Why Ant Doesn't Drink Neat Whisky Anymore

Weaknesses

  • Mirco chips and wagonwheels
  • He has no legs
  • Bad person
  • stupid injuries
  • Being punched in the liver by joe
  • Abdominal organs currently running at 30% efficiency
  • Regularly thinks about being a fishtank during jigeiko

Special Abilities

  • First kendoka made entirly from Meccano
  • Some really bad jodan
  • Finding girls with more issues than the Playboy Magazine
  • Member of the Hitler youth
  • Flying ace in Die Luftwaffe
  • Volunteer in Die Waffen SS
  • Blitzkrieg
  • Snap judgments of people, Nice/**nt no in between
  • Can drink beer through 8 straws at once
  • Deadly shot with an ice cube at 30 feet
  • Max-slayer

Awards

  • Iron Cross (First class)
  • Shortest time in shiaijo during Mumeishi 3's 2007. Official record of the day 17 seconds for 2 men cuts.

Quotes

  • I'm really tempted to have my head shaved
  • Waaaaaaaah.
  • Why does Hiro keep stroking me?
  • I'm not feeling the love right now
  • Give him a ball-gag and tell him wear it or lose it
  • Why do I only seem to go for girls with "baggage"?
  • I'd hit it like a blacksmith
  • Today for breakfast I had a packet of Microchips, a Wagonwheel and a jam sandwich I made with a fork
  • I went to a party last night, but it was in my kitchen so it wasn't far
  • Thats the last time you let Mr Whippy give you a Bukkake
  • Joe you get quite fruity when your drunk... No... stop it
  • I did something worse than abusing a blind disabled beggar
  • It is a pity that my collection of trophies contains not a single Russian. (This quote is often incorrectly attributed to Manfred Von Richtofen)
  • My hands smell like I've been fingering a dead person
  • I yanked a conker string
  • At least I don't have to have my nutsack cut open
  • VC GET THE VC!!!
  • So I told her she was special
  • They just wish they were us (applies for all clubs and associations)
  • I wasn't going to tell anyone about that kote, but now that you know from someone else chanting my name is ok.
  • All abit gay but i could quite happily watch him get mugged and eat some popcorn
  • If he says that again, no matter what context or how nicely im going to gut him with a wrench (refering to the use of the greeting "'OLA!")
  • The last time I drank neat whisky I woke up at 4am naked on a golf course
  • Quality table of jail bait over there. I want to dive in and rub myself all over them
  • I got hypnotised in a stageshow
  • Its like that, but in a car crash
  • I'm going to get beaten up in my sleep aren't I?
  • Its not fun being a Mollusc
  • I had a dream, and Bastin, you owed me money and you said "Can I pay you back in cuckoo clocks?"
  • He tried to finger me
  • Oooh! Toy cars!
  • I was at a train station and a kid looked at my shinai bag a said really loudly "Hey! Are you a Ninja?"
  • I was in waterstones looking for a new book, saw one that looked alright. In big letters on the back it said "the psycic elves are dying!" I slammed it down and got away from it fast
  • Gibbo, your tsuba is looks like cookiemonster's cock ring
  • Lets slow-hand-clap the minibus driver
  • I don't want to kiss Nick, I haven't drunk enough yet.
  • C'mon Nick, lets kiss again.
  • Not saying he is a peado but it was nature's calling for him and he decided to do a bit of budo instead.
  • I had a dream last night that Goodall was in a krunk hip hop dance class.
  • whats the point of being famous if it doesn't get my laid, I should have done darts instead
  • I completely fisted him though.
  • You could imagine him saying "Yeah we're trying for children, it means I have to jack off into a turkey baster"
  • I was tempted though, but I remember feeling sick. Then after that I remember being tempted again but knowing "it would be a bad thing"